If you are more interested in positive posts, go a head and grab yourself a hot cup of coffee and come back in a few days, there will be something new and positive for you.
Otherwise, hey — I warned ya!
Most days, weeks (heck, even months) life out here feels like a big fat “F”. This week was no exception. I received two rejections from agents, one for each book, and hide tanning seems to steadily get worse as I go.
After deciding to turn my lovely fur into buckskin, even that seems to be going downhill. I had little issue getting all the hair/grain off, but afterward, it appeared I had scraped it too much!
Now please understand, in every article I have read, everyone says YOU CANNOT SCRAPE TOO DEEP. It just doesn’t work. Your only concern is using too sharp a tool and slicing the hide.
So I scraped good and hard!
However, my skin is so thin, I can see right through it! Not everywhere, just some places. I don’t know how or why, but it appeared that when I fleshed it, I must have scraped too deep (hence why the hair began falling out).
And here lies the very reason why tanning is so difficult to learn. Like I said before, the steps are simple, but completing each step is inherently complex!
Making matters still worse, the book flat out says “Suzanne Cook, your life is too crazy, don’t even attempt this!”
Ok, so it didn’t really say that, but it was pretty close! Something like, “Do not attempt to tan hides if other life commitments such as kids constantly surround you.” Sigh. Yep. That’s me.
I don’t know, maybe I have a sick obsession with crashing and burning. Throwing everything I have into something, only to come back empty-handed. Isn’t that why I began writing? I spent a whole year dragging myself up early to squeeze-in a tiny bit of time to write, and GET MY BOOK PUBLISHED.
How’s that going for me?
Erik likes to ask about that one. “Hun, I thought you said you’d get your book published by now?”
He’s also the one that said I’m never going to get anything published, and certainly no one would buy it anyhow.
But he’s right. My goal had been to get published by Christmas. My Mom had died just 2 days after Christmas 6 years ago. It was the day anniversary of her death this year (2016). Right before she died, I stayed up all night printing her a copy of my book Soldier’s Child. I had told her my whole life I wanted to be an author, and she always told me it wasn’t a realistic goal. I wanted to prove her wrong that night. I don’t know if she even read it. She was probably too far gone.
Remembering that, I wanted to change the tone of Christmas forever, and let it be the celebration God made it to be. I wanted my life to come full circle. 2017 would be the year for Suzanne! Agents! Publishing deals! Soft deer hides and buckskins!
No, so far it’s looking like the year of the “F”. Failed. There will most likely be lots of days scurrying off to the hay loft to cry and feel sorry for myself.
But I’ve got the transparent buckskin I’m still working on . . . todays project. My day has already been set-up to fail since my 3 yr old will be home all day — no school for him on early release Fridays. I was supposed to string it up last night, but between dealing with house/family all evening and taking an hour to sew holes (there were way too many), it was 10pm before I could begin stringing it up on the frame. Expecting at least 2 hours of work, that would leave me at midnight. Again. No thanks. I’ll just have to take my chance during naptime.
IF he takes a nap. I’ve got to run the kids to the library RIGHT when my oldest gets home, so normal naptime at 1pm will get bumped to 2pm.
Hopefully tomorrow’s post will be one of excitement and triumph with a lovely tanned buckskin. Being realistic though, I’m pretty sure it won’t be.